“For after all, the best one can do when it’s raining, is to let it rain.” Henry Walsworth Longfellow
As a Mother, Life Coach, Therapist, and over some years have been an educator. Wearing all these hats makes one consider much when parenting. Lately, our government and their changes in policy are so off and sad that one has to wonder if they are parents and if they actually read what they suggest or is it someone sitting there in a small cubical writing up policy changes and then it spirals up and down the chain one mahogany desk at a time. I have worked in government before and different colour papers mean different things, There is actually white paper and green paper on which policy is printed. The readers I often wonder, do they find themselves just adding a signature to a bill or act simply to get through their piles of brown envelopes and files on their desks. And while this is not the actual rubber stamp before it gets gazetted it is passed through us for public opinion. This part I actually find very amusing. To me, it’s like the years as a child in my parent’s home. We had prayer time daily as a family and then discussion time. If we had a beef with one another or wanted something to be addressed or changed we were encouraged to write a letter about our grievances. It was one way to get siblings to communicate instead of shouting or slamming doors. Please do get this, in our household, shouting and slamming doors actually was received with an extra slamming of a hand or slipper that met your behind. So no, one never reacted like that when the adults were around. So to get the rules changed in our family we had to write letters. They never quite enforced those changes, but it truly was a lovely thought to be heard.
So I guess public opinion is much like that. A chance for your yay or nay to be heard. This then brings me to who actually stumbles across these unless it is brought through the attention of free and independent journalism. Thankfully so, we still have this medium in our country or we all would be in a total blackout (pun intended), holding a flicker of light to wade through the rather heavy loaded white and green papers shared for public opinion. I have total respect for journalism and journalist as there is a sense of blind trust in what is printed, written up or shared by a reputable independent newspaper. And so this is where my rambling takes me today. The new changes coming at the basic education level.
Some years ago I had a mini meltdown with the changes in the child act. I do tend to get very vocal and worked up on issues that affect my sons, especially when they are at the age these things affect them and my ability to parent.
In 2019, there was a change in the child act. It communicated that there would be a change to the age of consent to engage in sexual activities. The right to make decisions about contraception and the right to choose what to do with your body in the event of a pregnancy. Oh, with my all, my head was screaming hold me back, hold me back. Isn’t there any wonder it takes so many steps and signatures for public opinion, by the time it gets to us, either the bill has already been passed, the dates have lapsed or every voter never really gets an opportunity to actually be aware of these things? You would need to become a policy troll and live for writing a letter in anger, or frustration, never rarely in support of the irrational thinking of the powers that be.
These are some of the really insane moves that were made, that passed us without really finding us. Grade 4 -10-year-olds are to be introduced to the topics of Sex and Sexuality. At 10 a child is still very much a child, not a tween or a teen but a child. A child who hasn’t matured in mind or body. Whose thoughts are still those far removed from the reality of adult life and understanding the consequences thereof. And so, this was all safely tucked away in lesson plans under Comprehensive Sexuality Education.
Then there was giving the power to “strangers” and I use that term loosely. Strangers because for all intents and purposes, teachers are strangers to a child. They see them at school and engage with them at school but no teacher truly knows each and every child, their home lives, their social life, spiritual and cultural lives; which are totally separate from that of school life. And no child or parent really knows their teacher and their intentions, thoughts, and life outside school. Yet we are giving an Educator and an education system the right to tell our children about their sexuality and about sex. Our government now allows an education system to educate a child about a topic that should be a parent, guardian, or caregiver, decision to make when the appropriate time for this talk is to be had. We are now taking a child and giving a teacher the power to talk to my child about their body, the private parts, how they work, the pleasure they bring, the role they play in life, and the explanation of the very act of sex at 10 years of age.
I am not naive to think that every child has the ability to speak to their parents about these phases in their lives. I am well aware that some children learn about the “birds and the bees” through friends or a trusted adult with whom they have an open relationship. However, it’s not the where, or the how but the age at which the powers that be think my child should be exposed to sexuality, sex, and the intimate personal private parts of their bodies. This is a stage that every parent should have the right to choose when and how their child should become aware. Not because a school curriculum deems it appropriate. Oh, this one definitely snuck in without an appropriate uproar.
Are we not encouraging the age of sexuality and the act of sex to further be decreased, at the very time when we are fighting a pandemic of teen pregnancy, rape, and sexual abuse? Information is power and power is knowledge and in the wrong hands can be very dangerous. Something as beautiful and intimate as sex between loving and committed partners, not 10 year old’s can be the very downfall of a society. It further demeans its values and creates a further rift between race groups, cultures, faiths, and belief systems. Did we not just give a Grade 4, a 10-year-old a smoking gun? I wonder if the curriculum at Grade 4 will have information about cervical cancers, suicide from rejection, mental from hormone imbalances, and the responsibility of adulting all information I personally feel is way too early, the same time we celebrate “Pen Licenses”. This is when what we are taught, we practice and in turn at this age cannot handle all that it comes with. Will it teach, going on the pill, injections, uid’s, condoms, STDs, HIV/aids, etc as well?
So our thinking in drafting these papers for public opinion, in this case before a child even reaches puberty, they can have access to all this information. And all information must be because you cannot give only half the information, not when the consequences of that information are a Pandora’s Box of a holy mess.
If you google what is deemed a minor in South Africa it would be anyone under 18. Then google consenting age to have sex in South Africa, that would be 16. If an 18-year-old has sex with a 16year old that’s considered rape, Because the person is two years older than contenting age. However, it is not rape if the partners are 16 and 14 or 14 and 12, because of their maturity, and both are considered minors. However, we will teach sexuality and sex, at 10 years old and expect no experimenting and testing of this wonderful information. Did they actually think that a person given any information will simply keep it in their mind and not act on the information? Oh, the fine web we weave. Then there is the topic of abortion and if an adult has to consent to the abortion should the minor child so wish. I will save this for another article however, the act then refers to “all women” having a right to their bodies and in this instant also includes the minor girl child as a woman. Need I say more? Words and play with and on words can make one dizzy and well knowledgeable it seems.
So why did I choose to open this pandora’s box, well there is another bill that is on the table for changes in Basic Education. It’s called the BELLA BILL.
The BELA Bill aims to make a host of changes to schools in South Africa, including controversial proposals such as giving the government the final say over language policies at schools, as well as allowing schools to sell alcohol at after-hours, non-school related activities. The laws propose big changes to the compulsory starting age for children in South Africa while clarifying and formalizing aspects of home education and financial administration of schools in the country.
Some of the key amendments that the bill aims to make include:
- Making grade R the new compulsory school starting age, as opposed to grade 1, as is currently the case.
- Forcing home-schooled learners to be registered for this type of schooling.
- Criminalising parents who do not ensure their child or children are in school, with fines or jail time up to 12 months.
- Holding school governing bodies more accountable for disclosures of financial interests – including those related to their spouses and family members.
- Prohibiting educators from conducting business with the state or being a director of public or private companies conducting business with the state.
- Abolishing corporal punishment and initiation/hazing practices.
- Allowing schools to sell alcohol outside of school hours.
- Giving government department heads power over language policies and the curriculum a school must adopt.
A grapevine conversation is a talk about having unisex (gender natural) toilets and about additional immunizations that will be given at school
So like me, you must be wondering where can I get the opportunity to have my say about this, according to Business Tech, The public at large will now have an opportunity to have their say in the proposed laws.
Provincial public hearings on the laws will commence on Friday afternoon, 24 February 2023, starting in Limpopo. Hearings are expected to continue to the North-West Province and Gauteng in March 2023.
Ooops readers, I am so sorry, we missed the right to have an opinion and a say in what ultimately affects our children and the rights we have as their parents. So my advice, get cracking on reading up on what is happening in your country that affects, you, your children, and your community. Before you know it, you may just find yourself locked up and not knowing and claiming ignorance is not a defense, because somewhere there was a notice and a time for you to raise your voice.
